Well again I am being really bad about updating, but here is what our lovely summer has been about. I am really bummed I do not have pics to add to this to show all of the fun we have been having!
Summer started out a little rocky with my new job and all. It was hard for me to get in a routine of leaving in the morning and being home in time to get ready for work, so sadly we were just staying at home. It wasn't all that fun though :(
The last week of June J and I both took vacation time off of work. It was a really fun week for our family. We spent the week with my wonderful brother in law, sister in law and my niece and nephew. It is always a great time with them :) We first took the kids to Holiday World and boy was that fun!!! My Angel and WildMan surprised me so much in not showing fear of anything. They were both willing to ride and play in whatever their height allowed. My Angel rode a big wooden roller coaster with me. She asked to ride and when we were finally sitting in the cart to soon be pulled up to the highest part of the coaster, she was very terrified. I was reassuring her it would be fun if she would just relax and trust in me that I wouldn't let anything happen to her. So with my arm wrapped around her and my other holding the bar ever so tightly we were flying through the coaster. She was absolutely terrified through the entire ride, but she rode it!!!! We get off and I asked her, " well did you like it?" She replies with, " I don't want to ride anymore today", LOL!!!!
Miss Spitfire and Sunshine were my little chickens all day and were scared to do everything. I will give full credit to Spitfire for riding a few water rides that I thought were scary for her. She was with my sister in law at the time so I didn't get to see her, but she was happy to tell me about them even though she was very scared of them, lol! Miss Sunshine is a child who is scared of her own shadow, so standing in the wading pool ( it was 1 and a half foot deep) was her excitement for the day! She wanted nothing to do with anything that moved, splashed or made noise! hehe~
We spent the rest of the week swimming and cooking out, it really was relaxing and very fun for all of the kids and of course all of us adults! Oh yeah we managed to squeeze in an Indians Game as well. My Angel was my only child who wanted to go, so we dropped the others off at Mamaw's house! We of course went with my brother and sister in law again. The kids all had a good time, eating junk and playing a few games! It had been years since I had been to a game and it was very refreshing to do something new :)
This same week I took the kids to the Beech Grove fireworks with my dear friend, her husband and kiddos. It was a very quick event, but the kids loved it. Wildman thought it was very cool, but went to fast!
We have been spending the rest of the summer at the pool. My wonderful Mother has a friend who runs an apartment complex and she welcomes the kids and I to swim anytime and it really has been wonderful. We have swam more this summer than the past 2 summers combined. I am in heaven and I know the kids are too! I have also figured out my routine so we can leave during the day even on the days I work... I know I am a dork!
Summer has been just great so far and I am not looking forward to school starting back up at all :( I love having my babies at home and getting to sleep in is also a plus :)
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Monday, June 21, 2010
Do they really know?
Who knows if they fully understand at this age, but they have to have some concept of it! If they don't I can't wait until the day they really know and really see it :)
He wakes up everyday at 5am for them.
He goes to work everyday for them.
He checks on them every night before he goes to bed.
He plays with each one of them. He makes sure they smile everyday.
He would risk everything for them.
He wakes up and goes to bed with them on his mind.
He wants nothing, but the best for them.
He teaches them, he disciplines them, he respects them.
He makes sure the Holidays are for them.
He makes sure every Birthday is wonderful and special for them.
He goes without, so they can have it all.
He makes sure they are able to pursue their interest.
He cooks for them. He cleans for them.
He makes sure their lives are full of love.
He does all he can to keep them safe.
He does all he can to help them be them.
He is reassuring, loving, caring, a comfort...
He is their DAD! So do they really know...
How wonderful and amazing their Dad is? Do they really know how lucky and blessed they are to have such a man as their Dad?!?!?! I see it and love it! One day they will too and until that day I will do all I can to help them see it and feel it! J you are amazing and I love you!
He wakes up everyday at 5am for them.
He goes to work everyday for them.
He checks on them every night before he goes to bed.
He plays with each one of them. He makes sure they smile everyday.
He would risk everything for them.
He wakes up and goes to bed with them on his mind.
He wants nothing, but the best for them.
He teaches them, he disciplines them, he respects them.
He makes sure the Holidays are for them.
He makes sure every Birthday is wonderful and special for them.
He goes without, so they can have it all.
He makes sure they are able to pursue their interest.
He cooks for them. He cleans for them.
He makes sure their lives are full of love.
He does all he can to keep them safe.
He does all he can to help them be them.
He is reassuring, loving, caring, a comfort...
He is their DAD! So do they really know...
How wonderful and amazing their Dad is? Do they really know how lucky and blessed they are to have such a man as their Dad?!?!?! I see it and love it! One day they will too and until that day I will do all I can to help them see it and feel it! J you are amazing and I love you!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
A little update
I feel a little update is in order! I have been working almost every night so my blogging as been put on the back burner due to being tired... sorry!
I am loving my new job. I am however working almost every night and that is wearing me out! I hope to just prove myself in the next few weeks to be able to be bumped up to a better dinner section to hopefully make more money ( the reason for the job)!!!
J and I have grown tremendously as a couple within the last couple of months and I couldn't be happier. I kind of feel like a high school couple who can't wait to see one another or talk to one another. We are each others biggest cheer leaders and support system. He has been helping me so much and in the end it makes me love him even more. Our love has grown and is in a place I am not sure either of us has felt since being married. It is truly wonderful :) I am hoping to renew our vows in 2 years... which will be our 10 year Anniversary! I have begun the brainstorming for this fabulous event, lol :)
My Angel is just fantastic! School is out and she has some great ideas for ways to spend our summer. She is definitely growing into a young lady. She is in the beginning stages of puberty which is sometimes hard to tip toe around, lol. The emotions are always on the surface with her. She is still just as smart as ever though. She got a library card today ( thanks to my beautiful mother for taking her). She is just as excited about her 7 books as she is about buying a new toy or game. She found out 2 weeks ago who her teacher will be for next year and she will be in a "cluster class" which means an above average classroom. J and I are just thrilled for her! She was soooo excited even though she said she knew this was going to happen! lol
Miss Spitfire is exactly what her nickname is... a spitfire! She is cute as a button, but has a fiery attitude. She is into aggravating all of the kids and pushing her limits. She likes to test the waters to see how far she can go with everything! She is loving summer and if up to her she would never come inside! She is so active and wants to be doing something 24/7!
On the health side of things, she has had some serious ear pain for quite some time now. I was thinking it all has to do with her Crohn's and sinus', but I am now leaning towards getting her tonsils removed. She snores so bad at night that she sometimes stops breathing ( an issue we dealt with at 3 weeks old with her)! I am thinking her adenoids and tonsils are so big it is causing ear pressure and breathing issues. So I am hoping to get her into the doctor soon to check into this a little more. Her Crohn's has so far been doing very well. She has fully adjusted to her diet and will let everyone know what she can and can't eat without me saying a word! She has made me very proud of her with how she deals with all of this. Such a big girl :)
Wildman is just that as well... wild! I love him to death, well I love all of my kids to death, haha! He keeps me laughing all of the time! I will admit though that he is ALL boy! He has been wrestling and getting into little fights ( play fights) with all of us and he loves it! I am thinking when he gets a little older wrestling might be something we look into! He has grown so much (not really in height or weight) but in the since of his speech, his attention span, his understanding of things in the world and how different things work! He is just awesome and I am really loving this age with him. He is very independent and to be honest I love it :) He will wake up in the morning and run and go all day until I have to make him lay down which is usually around 11pm ( when I get home from work)! Who has that much energy??? Not me!!!
Miss Sunshine is growing everyday in the same way as Wildman! She will hold an entire conversation with you and it is the cutest thing you have ever heard! She talks with her hands and body and just really gets into whatever it is she is talking to you about! We recently bought her Dora big girl panties and a cute little potty chair to sit in the front room for her to sit on! Right now she is really into just playing with it. She will sit on it and say she is going potty but she is usually fully dressed when saying this, lol! She is staying dry in her diapers most of the day and almost all night. She immediately tells me when she poops in her diaper and brings me wipes and a new diaper. She is ready, I am ready, I am ready to be done with diapers forever :) So hoping this potty training goes well and hopefully she will be in panties before July!!! I also have to say she has almost mastered riding her tricycle as well... she has gotten so big, so fast!
One more important update and that is about The Crohn's and Colitis Walk ( Take Steps Be Heard Walk) that happened last weekend! I had no idea what to expect with this walk or what would really be taking place! It was in the beautiful area of the White River State Park. We had a few family members show up and we had a great time. I know the kids had a blast jumping in the bounce house provided :) I am excited to announce that I was the number one Fundraiser and my team "Straton's Team" came in 3rd! I think what we did is so rewarding and awesome! We didn't have a whole lot of support at the walk, but what we did have was more then I could have asked for.The people who showed up for us were the same people I can always count on being there for me and have been there for me! They all walked beside Straton and I and helped us raise almost 2K for the CCFA! Such a wonderful evening that will forever be embedded in my memory! I can't wait until next year to do it all over again :) To all of you who supported us physically, spiritually and financially... THANK YOU!!!!!
So I hope you are now caught up on our crazy wonderful lives, so sorry it is a mini update of each person and issue... I am a slacker and admit it!
I am loving my new job. I am however working almost every night and that is wearing me out! I hope to just prove myself in the next few weeks to be able to be bumped up to a better dinner section to hopefully make more money ( the reason for the job)!!!
J and I have grown tremendously as a couple within the last couple of months and I couldn't be happier. I kind of feel like a high school couple who can't wait to see one another or talk to one another. We are each others biggest cheer leaders and support system. He has been helping me so much and in the end it makes me love him even more. Our love has grown and is in a place I am not sure either of us has felt since being married. It is truly wonderful :) I am hoping to renew our vows in 2 years... which will be our 10 year Anniversary! I have begun the brainstorming for this fabulous event, lol :)
My Angel is just fantastic! School is out and she has some great ideas for ways to spend our summer. She is definitely growing into a young lady. She is in the beginning stages of puberty which is sometimes hard to tip toe around, lol. The emotions are always on the surface with her. She is still just as smart as ever though. She got a library card today ( thanks to my beautiful mother for taking her). She is just as excited about her 7 books as she is about buying a new toy or game. She found out 2 weeks ago who her teacher will be for next year and she will be in a "cluster class" which means an above average classroom. J and I are just thrilled for her! She was soooo excited even though she said she knew this was going to happen! lol
Miss Spitfire is exactly what her nickname is... a spitfire! She is cute as a button, but has a fiery attitude. She is into aggravating all of the kids and pushing her limits. She likes to test the waters to see how far she can go with everything! She is loving summer and if up to her she would never come inside! She is so active and wants to be doing something 24/7!
On the health side of things, she has had some serious ear pain for quite some time now. I was thinking it all has to do with her Crohn's and sinus', but I am now leaning towards getting her tonsils removed. She snores so bad at night that she sometimes stops breathing ( an issue we dealt with at 3 weeks old with her)! I am thinking her adenoids and tonsils are so big it is causing ear pressure and breathing issues. So I am hoping to get her into the doctor soon to check into this a little more. Her Crohn's has so far been doing very well. She has fully adjusted to her diet and will let everyone know what she can and can't eat without me saying a word! She has made me very proud of her with how she deals with all of this. Such a big girl :)
Wildman is just that as well... wild! I love him to death, well I love all of my kids to death, haha! He keeps me laughing all of the time! I will admit though that he is ALL boy! He has been wrestling and getting into little fights ( play fights) with all of us and he loves it! I am thinking when he gets a little older wrestling might be something we look into! He has grown so much (not really in height or weight) but in the since of his speech, his attention span, his understanding of things in the world and how different things work! He is just awesome and I am really loving this age with him. He is very independent and to be honest I love it :) He will wake up in the morning and run and go all day until I have to make him lay down which is usually around 11pm ( when I get home from work)! Who has that much energy??? Not me!!!
Miss Sunshine is growing everyday in the same way as Wildman! She will hold an entire conversation with you and it is the cutest thing you have ever heard! She talks with her hands and body and just really gets into whatever it is she is talking to you about! We recently bought her Dora big girl panties and a cute little potty chair to sit in the front room for her to sit on! Right now she is really into just playing with it. She will sit on it and say she is going potty but she is usually fully dressed when saying this, lol! She is staying dry in her diapers most of the day and almost all night. She immediately tells me when she poops in her diaper and brings me wipes and a new diaper. She is ready, I am ready, I am ready to be done with diapers forever :) So hoping this potty training goes well and hopefully she will be in panties before July!!! I also have to say she has almost mastered riding her tricycle as well... she has gotten so big, so fast!
One more important update and that is about The Crohn's and Colitis Walk ( Take Steps Be Heard Walk) that happened last weekend! I had no idea what to expect with this walk or what would really be taking place! It was in the beautiful area of the White River State Park. We had a few family members show up and we had a great time. I know the kids had a blast jumping in the bounce house provided :) I am excited to announce that I was the number one Fundraiser and my team "Straton's Team" came in 3rd! I think what we did is so rewarding and awesome! We didn't have a whole lot of support at the walk, but what we did have was more then I could have asked for.The people who showed up for us were the same people I can always count on being there for me and have been there for me! They all walked beside Straton and I and helped us raise almost 2K for the CCFA! Such a wonderful evening that will forever be embedded in my memory! I can't wait until next year to do it all over again :) To all of you who supported us physically, spiritually and financially... THANK YOU!!!!!
So I hope you are now caught up on our crazy wonderful lives, so sorry it is a mini update of each person and issue... I am a slacker and admit it!
Monday, May 31, 2010
My new role
I am officially now a working Mom! I haven't really been able to say that in a really long time. I have been a stay at home Mom for what feels like an eternity and I loved-love it! I am currently only working nights, but it honestly feels weird.
It is a weird that no one can understand unless you have stayed at home with kids for years. I kind of hate to admit it, but I am loving my new job! I am working as a waitress at The Cheesecake Factory and to some that is a belittling job... to me it is perfect! Yes I would love to make the money of a lawyer or a nurse, but for me this job is exactly what I needed! I love interacting with other people, helping people, having such a flexible schedule that allows me to spend my everyday still at home with all 4 of my babies and work at night! The other half of my weird feeling is, I don't get to tuck my kids into bed every night. This is something I totally took for granted when I did it every night, heck sometimes I complained about it. It would be yelling "I don't want to go to bed", me waiting on each kid to hug and kiss miss Sunshine while I found her baby and blankie, making sure they were all in bed, covered up, hugged and kissed, this light on and this light off. Sometimes it would take 20 minutes or so. Now that I am not here most nights to do this, I miss it and feel bad for complaining about it or asking J to do it!
I realize with this new job how much of a difference it does and will make for my family! Of course it has it pro's and con's, but both big differences! I like having the adult conversations, I like making money, I don't like that I hardly see J on days that I work, I don't like that my kids whine when I tell them I have to work, I don't like seeing their sad faces when I leave, I don't like not being the last face they see when they go to sleep, but I know this is what needs to happen for my family!
This job has in a way really opened my eyes to how important my family is to me. Please don't misunderstand that, they were and always will be my number one priority. It just makes me see how blessed I am and how I want to do nothing, but make them all happy... especially J. I feel overjoyed that I have them and I know when I get off of work they will all be here ( asleep, but still here)! They love me and I love them! Family is so important and without each one of them I would be lost. They all have my heart and even when I am running crazy at work to serve other families and to make sure they are enjoying their evening... my family is always on my mind :) My time with them is way more valued and cherished! This job so far is such a blessing and I just hope it continues to go so well and remains beneficial!
Did I mention their Cheesecake is phenomenal?!
Well it is :)
It is a weird that no one can understand unless you have stayed at home with kids for years. I kind of hate to admit it, but I am loving my new job! I am working as a waitress at The Cheesecake Factory and to some that is a belittling job... to me it is perfect! Yes I would love to make the money of a lawyer or a nurse, but for me this job is exactly what I needed! I love interacting with other people, helping people, having such a flexible schedule that allows me to spend my everyday still at home with all 4 of my babies and work at night! The other half of my weird feeling is, I don't get to tuck my kids into bed every night. This is something I totally took for granted when I did it every night, heck sometimes I complained about it. It would be yelling "I don't want to go to bed", me waiting on each kid to hug and kiss miss Sunshine while I found her baby and blankie, making sure they were all in bed, covered up, hugged and kissed, this light on and this light off. Sometimes it would take 20 minutes or so. Now that I am not here most nights to do this, I miss it and feel bad for complaining about it or asking J to do it!
I realize with this new job how much of a difference it does and will make for my family! Of course it has it pro's and con's, but both big differences! I like having the adult conversations, I like making money, I don't like that I hardly see J on days that I work, I don't like that my kids whine when I tell them I have to work, I don't like seeing their sad faces when I leave, I don't like not being the last face they see when they go to sleep, but I know this is what needs to happen for my family!
This job has in a way really opened my eyes to how important my family is to me. Please don't misunderstand that, they were and always will be my number one priority. It just makes me see how blessed I am and how I want to do nothing, but make them all happy... especially J. I feel overjoyed that I have them and I know when I get off of work they will all be here ( asleep, but still here)! They love me and I love them! Family is so important and without each one of them I would be lost. They all have my heart and even when I am running crazy at work to serve other families and to make sure they are enjoying their evening... my family is always on my mind :) My time with them is way more valued and cherished! This job so far is such a blessing and I just hope it continues to go so well and remains beneficial!
Did I mention their Cheesecake is phenomenal?!
Well it is :)
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Wild Man's Birth Story
Wild Man was welcomed into our family on May 25, 2006! Buddy I am so sorry this did not get posted on your actual birthday :(
May 21st I went into my OB for my check up and she informed me I was dilated to 3cm. I was ecstatic!!! However I was only 34weeks and 6 days along. Hang on...let me back up for just a second, Wild Man was a baby we tried very hard to conceive. I desperately wanted a boy sooooo bad. That is the only reason I couldn't say no to more babies after Miss Spitfire. I wanted him so much and the day I found out I was having a boy, I balled during the whole ultrasound. When she said I was having a boy she had to give me Kleenex's due to the snot and tears that were combining all over my face, LOL!!!! So needless to say I was more than anxious to meet him.
Back to my OB appointment ( sorry I get off track very easily). She also mentioned to me that she was going on vacation that Friday for 2 weeks. She offered me the choice of coming into the hospital Thursday morning to see how my contractions were coming along and if I could be induced she would induce me or I could just go on and risk her being on vacation if I delivered. I don't have a history at all of my kids coming early ( I had been induced with both my girls)! So without thinking of my beautiful boy, my selfish instincts of course chose Thursday May 25th to possibly be induced.
My Momma of course kept my girls for us. We went to the hospital and I was contracting but not having strong ones. They were very consistent, but not strong. J and I walked the halls for what felt like forever to get things moving along. It worked a little... my next check I was dilated to a 4, so she decided to break my water and admit me. J and I were so excited. I called J's mom and my Mom to let them know we were staying. I was then taken to the only room that was left... the C-section room. I was then hooked up to pitocin and things were trucking along. My nurse was great, my needs were met, I had an epidural put in around 6cm and J's Mom came to be with us, things were wonderful!!!!
About 8pm we realized my monitor was going off, the nurse came in calmly and asked me to roll over and put a pillow under my belly. She said it happens all of the time and rolling over helps the baby! The monitor was the baby's heart beat, it was very low :( I of course rolled over, but sadly the monitor wouldn't stop going off. She had me roll over to the other side, didn't work. She went and got some belly band to help push him down or something along those lines ( to be honest at this point I was a little frantic so I am not sure at all what the belly band was for)! I asked her to please get my doctor and she did. My doctor was in there within 2 minutes and she immediately said we need to get him out and we need to get him out NOW by C-section. I was balling and so scared. Scared for my baby, scared to have a C-section and scared of the unknown. I had 2 minutes for them to prep things so I called my mom to let her know and before I hung up they were wheeling me back.
They got me all ready and then J was brought in. I was shaking so bad I bit my tongue a couple of times. I had serious trimmers and was very nauseous. It was not a fun delivery at all. She had him out within 5 minutes after J was brought in. I sadly don't remember the exact minutes he was born ( I have this in his baby book I promise) but I know it was in the 9 o'clock hour ( pm). He was out and he was screaming, I had never been so relieved in my life to hear that loud shriek of a cry. All I kept saying was how little he was and how much he looked just like my girls. After I knew he was ok and I could talk again from crying so much, I asked if she knew what the problem was and he had the cord wrapped around his neck 2X's. Thank the Lord he never had to go to the NICU at all... he weighed 6lbs 9oz and was 18 in long and was healthy! He had the dark black hair and olive tan skin just like my girls! He was beautiful, too pretty to be a boy :)
To this day I find myself wondering, if the cord was due to my induction or if the induction was a blessing that saved his life! I will never know, but I will always question it.
I was so proud and so excited we had our boy. He was healthy, he was eating, peeing and pooing like he was supposed to. He never cried while in the hospital, so I thought he was completely perfect! Then we got home... he cried 24/7. Nothing I ever did helped him at all. He took almost an hour to drink every bottle and he ate every 2 hours. This every 2 hour feeding lasted throughout the day and night until he was 12 months. The DAY of his 1st birthday he slept through the night! I was the most tired and drained Momma out there for a YEAR! So just incase you couldn't figure it out...he was a HORRIBLE baby, but such a fun and hyper toddler. This past year has been the best year with him. When he turned 3 he became less defiant, a little more hyper, but not in the crazy way he was before, it was great! He is wonderful :)
To my handsome boy, I love you sooooooooo much! I wanted you more than you will ever know. You will always hold a special place in my heart. You keep me on my toes, but you always keep me laughing. I enjoy our late night snuggles and hugs and hope they never end! I love you with all of my heart and I am enjoying every minute of watching you grow up... yes even the ugly days! You make my heart smile and I can't wait to be there for every fun milestone you will soon start to hit! I love you my handsome buddy. Happy Belated Birthday ( still so sorry this was not done on your day)! Love, Mommy
XOXOXO
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
4 today
WOW... today my Wild Man is 4!!! I can not believe he is 4 already. He has grown into this adorable and hilarious little man!
He is ALL boy, he loves sports, trucks, cars, dirt, rocks, wrestling and of course video games! Is favorite thing in the whole world right now is cereal, LOL! He has to have it everyday as soon as he opens his eyes. When I come home from the store and I buy new cereal, it is honestly the same reaction we get on Christmas morning! So funny, but yet so cute!
He is so full of personality and humor. He keeps us all laughing daily. He makes us laugh just from watching him play and he has no idea we are watching him. Then there are times he is trying and will continue to try until he hears a chuckle :)
This past year has really been a fun one. Watching him grow into the little guy he is, has been great! He is so loving, sweet, funny, skinny and smart! He is my buddy and I am so blessed to have him. He makes me smile!
Happy Birthday my Handsome Boy! I love you sooo soooo soooooo much :)His birth story is to come sometime later today, just as I did for my girls!
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
A new role for me
I will be working... for the first time in a very long time! I will be starting a new part time evening job starting on Sunday!
J has always been the one to work while I stayed home with the kids. He has always worked multiple jobs for this to happen!! Somethings have changed in our financial status and J is now just working one job, so this is why I will be working. He wants a break from work and I think I want to take a break from being home with the kids 24/7!!! Still not really sure how I feel about it to be quite honest.
I am really excited to take on this challenge. It is a challenge for me to give up being home, physically going to work, doing well on the job, missing family functions, missing my kids' sport activities... missing a lot! It will be a challenge for both J and I. I don't think he really knows how challenging it can be to have to run this kid here, be back to pick that kid up from there, meet so and so here and so on, all by myself! I also don't know what it feels like to hear him call me while I am at work to tell me how crazy and stressful the kids are being, him telling me how well Miss Spitfire did at her game or to tell me what cook-out they have planned to go to on that day. I have no idea...
So as we embark on this new journey with our new roles, I only hope it is a great transition for our kids and makes a difference for our family. I am staying super positive about it all, it just makes me a little nervous with each passing day. Hopefully the nerves will subside and I will just be happy to get out and be a financial contributor to my family :)
Please keep us in your prayers for the weeks to come as we make the transition and that this new role is really better for all of us!!
J has always been the one to work while I stayed home with the kids. He has always worked multiple jobs for this to happen!! Somethings have changed in our financial status and J is now just working one job, so this is why I will be working. He wants a break from work and I think I want to take a break from being home with the kids 24/7!!! Still not really sure how I feel about it to be quite honest.
I am really excited to take on this challenge. It is a challenge for me to give up being home, physically going to work, doing well on the job, missing family functions, missing my kids' sport activities... missing a lot! It will be a challenge for both J and I. I don't think he really knows how challenging it can be to have to run this kid here, be back to pick that kid up from there, meet so and so here and so on, all by myself! I also don't know what it feels like to hear him call me while I am at work to tell me how crazy and stressful the kids are being, him telling me how well Miss Spitfire did at her game or to tell me what cook-out they have planned to go to on that day. I have no idea...
So as we embark on this new journey with our new roles, I only hope it is a great transition for our kids and makes a difference for our family. I am staying super positive about it all, it just makes me a little nervous with each passing day. Hopefully the nerves will subside and I will just be happy to get out and be a financial contributor to my family :)
Please keep us in your prayers for the weeks to come as we make the transition and that this new role is really better for all of us!!
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Mother's Day
Today is a day to recognize my MOM!!! I have a previous post on just how wonderful my Mom is! Well if you have read it, you know my Mom is the best... I think so anyway ( maybe I am a little bias, lol)
To me the definition of a good Mom is,
A woman who shows love unconditionally! A woman who is always there no matter the circumstance! A woman you can trust! A woman who would give up her life for her child! A woman who shows respect and compassion! A woman who strives for her child to reach excellence. A woman who knows what she is talking about, even if it doesn't really seem like it at the time... in the end we all know she did! A woman who wants nothing but the best for her child. A woman who will sacrifice everything for the well bring of her child. A woman who can be sneezed, puked and pooped on and still smile! A woman who shows her child how to love and be respectful. A woman who instills their child with values and morals. A woman who teaches their child responsibility. A woman who teaches their child to treat everyone else how they would want to be treated. A woman who is involved in their child's life ( goes to school functions, sports activities, has play dates, knows their child's friends, etc.)! A woman that no other person could ever replace...
This is the definition of my Mom! I could go on, but I think you get the point :) I hope my children think this of me when they are older. I hope to be the great Mom my mom is! Although a child and a mother's relationship can sometimes be very challenging, it is none the less the best relationship to have. No one could ever replace my Mom or even come close to the woman I think she is!
Mom, I love you and hope your Mother's Day is wonderful! I hope your day is filled with love and laughs!
To me the definition of a good Mom is,
A woman who shows love unconditionally! A woman who is always there no matter the circumstance! A woman you can trust! A woman who would give up her life for her child! A woman who shows respect and compassion! A woman who strives for her child to reach excellence. A woman who knows what she is talking about, even if it doesn't really seem like it at the time... in the end we all know she did! A woman who wants nothing but the best for her child. A woman who will sacrifice everything for the well bring of her child. A woman who can be sneezed, puked and pooped on and still smile! A woman who shows her child how to love and be respectful. A woman who instills their child with values and morals. A woman who teaches their child responsibility. A woman who teaches their child to treat everyone else how they would want to be treated. A woman who is involved in their child's life ( goes to school functions, sports activities, has play dates, knows their child's friends, etc.)! A woman that no other person could ever replace...
This is the definition of my Mom! I could go on, but I think you get the point :) I hope my children think this of me when they are older. I hope to be the great Mom my mom is! Although a child and a mother's relationship can sometimes be very challenging, it is none the less the best relationship to have. No one could ever replace my Mom or even come close to the woman I think she is!
Mom, I love you and hope your Mother's Day is wonderful! I hope your day is filled with love and laughs!
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
A new kind of sexiness
You know when I first started dating J, I was drawn to him and his sexiness, lol :) I hope this word doesn't offend anyone! Anyway, I was all about him! I loved his look, his attitude, the way he loved me... it was all sexy to me!
As we have gotten older and had a handful of babies the sexiness hasn't really gone away... it is just seen differently! I still think he is sexy and I still LOVE the way he loves me.
Today I had a house to clean. He was left with younger two babies while the older girls were in school. This is how it works every time I have to go clean. It was a beautiful day out, I had a very nice worship moment on the ride home ( listening to Klove of course)! I just had this wonderful sense of peace about my life. At this time in our lives things are changing, people I love are sick, J has had some work issues and now for the first time I really need to get a part time job. So peace about all of this seemed so far away, today it wasn't! I felt it, it was so rejuvenating :) I realized how much of struggle we will soon face, but I didn't care at all. We have each other and that is all that mattered today. The man I fell in love with, the man I feel is the same sexy man I met is still in love with me and loves our family!
On my way home I pulled down our street to see the most wonderful sight, my wonderful husband outside playing ball and riding bikes with the two babies. Seeing the father of your children playing with them is the most wonderful feeling in my opinion. I must say this happens all of the time ( playing with the kids) he always plays, it just usually isn't outside unless I am home! I immediately walked up to him and gave him a huge hug and told him how sexy he looked! They had been out for awhile so we rounded the kids up and went in to make lunch! I walked in and he cleaned the front room, kitchen and our room! Cleaned, vacuumed, wiped down, dishes done, trash out, toys up... CLEAN!!!! It was so refreshing to see a clean house after I just returned from cleaning someone else's house :) He is amazing and still has my heart!
Today was just a great day for us, we also took the kids to Dairy Queen for ice cream. We came home and he helped me with bath time and helped me prepare breakfast for the kids in the morning... he fried their bacon so I could sleep in an extra 30 minutes! Ahhhh the love I have for him! I am truly lucky to have him and I don't just say this because of today, but because of every day! He is my rock, my shoulder, my support, my HEART!!!! I am so blessed and thankful for him and our family :)
As we have gotten older and had a handful of babies the sexiness hasn't really gone away... it is just seen differently! I still think he is sexy and I still LOVE the way he loves me.
Today I had a house to clean. He was left with younger two babies while the older girls were in school. This is how it works every time I have to go clean. It was a beautiful day out, I had a very nice worship moment on the ride home ( listening to Klove of course)! I just had this wonderful sense of peace about my life. At this time in our lives things are changing, people I love are sick, J has had some work issues and now for the first time I really need to get a part time job. So peace about all of this seemed so far away, today it wasn't! I felt it, it was so rejuvenating :) I realized how much of struggle we will soon face, but I didn't care at all. We have each other and that is all that mattered today. The man I fell in love with, the man I feel is the same sexy man I met is still in love with me and loves our family!
On my way home I pulled down our street to see the most wonderful sight, my wonderful husband outside playing ball and riding bikes with the two babies. Seeing the father of your children playing with them is the most wonderful feeling in my opinion. I must say this happens all of the time ( playing with the kids) he always plays, it just usually isn't outside unless I am home! I immediately walked up to him and gave him a huge hug and told him how sexy he looked! They had been out for awhile so we rounded the kids up and went in to make lunch! I walked in and he cleaned the front room, kitchen and our room! Cleaned, vacuumed, wiped down, dishes done, trash out, toys up... CLEAN!!!! It was so refreshing to see a clean house after I just returned from cleaning someone else's house :) He is amazing and still has my heart!
Today was just a great day for us, we also took the kids to Dairy Queen for ice cream. We came home and he helped me with bath time and helped me prepare breakfast for the kids in the morning... he fried their bacon so I could sleep in an extra 30 minutes! Ahhhh the love I have for him! I am truly lucky to have him and I don't just say this because of today, but because of every day! He is my rock, my shoulder, my support, my HEART!!!! I am so blessed and thankful for him and our family :)
Saturday, May 1, 2010
This day 9 years ago
Today was a fabulous day for my Angel and I! Today is her actual birthday and like I said in my previous post... she opted not to have a party! She and I went shopping and then I took her and my nephew to Snapperz for a night of fun :) It was really a great day with her!
On this day 9 years ago my Angel made us a family! At the ripe old age of 18 I had the best blessing any woman could ask for... a healthy and beautiful baby girl! I had a very easy pregnancy with her. I did however have the first pregnancy thought, if I eat it and gain it, it will fall off when I have her! Boy was I mistaken, LOL!!!! I gained a healthy (almost) 80lbs, thanks to my late night Taco Bell cravings! I really wish someone would have warned me of this, but you live and learn I guess!
My due date with her was April 26th, 2001. Well that day came and gone and still no baby. J had orders to leave for Germany the 1st week in May with his National Guard unit, so I was worried! I asked my doctor if she would induce me so he would be able to be here for her birth and be able to spend some time with us before he left. I had to take a stress test first. The test went well so doc said I could come in Monday April 30th at 7 am to have her. I was thrilled!
My mom met us at the hospital that day. She was there the entire time with us, it was lovely! I had my pitocin put in at 8 am, so we were ready roll... except it didn't roll as fast as I was hoping! I remember having a lot of hard contraction after the doctor broke my water, so I of course called in for the drugs! They gave me an awful shot at first to see if it would just take the edge off. It did not do what they wanted it to at all, it made me feel very sick and dizzy. I hated the feeling so much I cried. No it wasn't a hysterical cry, but tears running down my cheek kind of cry. Finally after 2pm I had the wonderful epidural put in!
My mom and J played a little cards, watched some TV and I believe J took a little nap on the couch provided! I was bored and in no pain! During this time we had a few visitors to say hello and see how we were doing! I enjoyed the visits, it was a lot of J's family... his aunt and a few cousins. My step-dad and my brother came to say hi and hang out as well.
Well finally at around 9:30pm I was feeling pain again, I was actually happy to be feeling it cause it had to mean things were moving along right?! YES they were, she was ready to meet us! 10pm I was pushing! My mom and I were really hoping for an April baby, so I was trying so hard to deliver her before midnight! Of course that didn't happen, I pushed for over 2 hours. At 12:20am ( May 1st) I heard the most wonderful sound any parent can hear, my beautiful baby crying! She was perfect, 7lbs 12oz and 21 in long. She had the olive tanish skin with a head full of black hair. I was in awe of her. Everyone but the doctor was in tears my mom, J, me and my nurse! My mom so patiently waited to hold her, but all she kept asking was how I was doing. I was on top of the world... cloud 9 to be exact! I had never felt the joy and happiness that I was feeling. Most people don't know that feeling until they have experienced having a baby, it is the best!
After she was all cleaned, checked and healthy we had a few more visitors that night, it was like 1:30 in the morning! I didn't care at all, I was not one bit tired. I was so hyper and just ready to be a mom. I will never forget the moment when they laid her in the warmer beside my bed after everyone was gone and all I could do was stare at her. She was mine, J and I made her, she is perfect! I couldn't stop taking pictures of her either, I think I had like 15 of her in the exact same position in the warmer :)
Like I said I was only 18 when I had her, but I couldn't have been happier! I had to grow up quicker than my friends, but I didn't care! She was my everything and I was going to give anything and everything up for her. From the second she was born I couldn't remember my life before her. How did I live 18 years without her, cause I definitely couldn't live another second without her!
My Angel was a very difficult baby though, she was colic and cried ALL of the time! As soon as she turned 1 year, she was an angel. She has always been such a great kid! I couldn't ask for anything better than what she is!!! Today I had the day with just her and it was honestly just as fun as going out with my friends. We were picking out clothes, laughing, dancing and singing in the car... it was great!
My beautiful Angel you have been such a blessing these past 9 years. You are a remarkable child with a heart of gold. You make me so proud and I hope you know I love you to the moon and back! I have enjoyed every minute of watching you grow up and I know the years to come will be just as great! Happy Birthday beautiful girl :)
Thursday, April 29, 2010
9 in 2 days
My first born, my Angel will be 9 in 2 days!!!! 9, I still can't believe it has been 9 years since she was welcomed into our family!
I remember everything about my pregnancy and everything about her being little. She was a beautiful baby and is now a beautiful young lady!
She is a brilliant child, she makes honor roll every 9 weeks (if not straight A's)! She is top of her class and can read at a 5th grade reading level. She takes pride in all of her school work and cares for every person in her class including her teacher!
She is so grown up this year, she has decided she doesn't want a birthday party! All she wants to do is get a pedicure, shop for new clothes, go out to lunch with just me and go do a fun activity... she has decided to go to Snapperz :) She wants the one on one time with me and I am so thankful for that. As a stay at home mom with a husband who works so much, I don't ever get one on one with any of my children. It saddens me that this doesn't happen, so I am thrilled she has chose this for her birthday this year!
The time has flown by! I miss the baby and toddler stage with her, but watching her turn into the young lady she has grown to be has been a pure joy! I can't wait to spend the day you my beautiful Angel!
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Time to relax
for now anyway!
Saturday was the day I had been working on for a solid three months, My Dinner Dance for Straton's Team! I must admit I have really mixed emotions on how this night went. I will start this off with how my day started:
I woke up at 6:15am because Straton had her opening day parade and game for softball. Well at 6:45 the parade was cancelled. We had her game as it was scheduled at 9am. Her game ended and an hour later and we proceeded to the Knights of Columbus to set up for the fundraiser. I was completely exhausted. I was so tired I felt like I was coming down with a sickness. It was not a good feeling at all. So anyway, we finished set up, I took the kids home to feed them lunch and lay the babies down for nap. I immediately walked out the door to go grocery shopping while the kids were sleeping ( yes J was home)! I made it home within an hour only to hop in the shower and get ready. Straton and I headed back to The Knights of Columbus to wait on the cake and food to arrive! This is when the night started...
At 5:30 my helpers ( my cousin and Aunt) showed up to help me. I had the Dj setting up and all we were doing was waiting on people to arrive. People were slowly coming in and I was so excited to see people there. I was absolutely thrilled that Straton's teacher showed up, she adores her and was hoping all day she would attend. Straton spent the first hour of the night with her playing riddly riddly ree and tic tac toe! I loved watching them and seeing how much her teacher really does care for her :) It was a very special moment not only for Strat, but for me as well!
Well 7pm had rolled around and it was time for dinner! We had a nice little crowd there. Everyone was mingling and eating. Things were going well as they did the whole night. It was a really nice evening. My mixed emotions about this was that I had reached out to over 2000 people with this event. I worked my butt off trying to sell and advertise tickets. At the end of the night I did a head count and we had 56 people there, myself included! J and I have more than 50 people in our families. This however did not at all ruin my night. I still danced ( even though the majority of the time it was by myself, LOL)! I was just so worried the whole night that people thought I was a dud who couldn't get people there. I didn't want people to feel like they wasted their money or even an evening when this fundraiser felt very dull. No one was dancing, few people knew each other and a lot of people ended up leaving early. Again this did not ruin my night!
I told myself the day of, no matter what happens I will let nothing ruin my night or stress me out. So I let nothing bother me. I waited until Sunday morning to dwell on what I could have done or shouldn't have done. I was really bummed that all of my hard work didn't look like hard work at all. I wanted people to see how much I wanted to make a change in this Foundation and for my daughter. By looking around at the event I don't think people could feel my passion and it really upset me. After recounting the money box for the 5th time I felt a lot better, because of the generous people who did come and support me they helped me raise over $1000 to give to the CCFA! 56 people raised $1000, that is remarkable to me :) I then decided not to be upset or heart broken over anything. These people wanted to help and they did. I couldn't be more grateful! Those are the people who matter, not the ones who didn't show. They deserved my joy and thanks, not my whining or venting about what didn't happen! Everyone who helped me put this on worked hard and I think all in all we had a fun night that helped a foundation fund more research :) What more could I ask for right?!
So I have decided to be thankful for this year, but to work even harder next year! I will plan better and make the changes that need to be made! I will not stop fundraising or helping the CCFA though, it will be an everyday thing for me! I will however say, I do not for the life of me remember what I did with my spare time before this fundraiser idea came to mind, LOL!!!!
A big thank you to all of my friends and family who supported me through this fundraising process and attending my benefit. I will never forget what you all did for us to help make a difference!
Saturday was the day I had been working on for a solid three months, My Dinner Dance for Straton's Team! I must admit I have really mixed emotions on how this night went. I will start this off with how my day started:
I woke up at 6:15am because Straton had her opening day parade and game for softball. Well at 6:45 the parade was cancelled. We had her game as it was scheduled at 9am. Her game ended and an hour later and we proceeded to the Knights of Columbus to set up for the fundraiser. I was completely exhausted. I was so tired I felt like I was coming down with a sickness. It was not a good feeling at all. So anyway, we finished set up, I took the kids home to feed them lunch and lay the babies down for nap. I immediately walked out the door to go grocery shopping while the kids were sleeping ( yes J was home)! I made it home within an hour only to hop in the shower and get ready. Straton and I headed back to The Knights of Columbus to wait on the cake and food to arrive! This is when the night started...
At 5:30 my helpers ( my cousin and Aunt) showed up to help me. I had the Dj setting up and all we were doing was waiting on people to arrive. People were slowly coming in and I was so excited to see people there. I was absolutely thrilled that Straton's teacher showed up, she adores her and was hoping all day she would attend. Straton spent the first hour of the night with her playing riddly riddly ree and tic tac toe! I loved watching them and seeing how much her teacher really does care for her :) It was a very special moment not only for Strat, but for me as well!
Well 7pm had rolled around and it was time for dinner! We had a nice little crowd there. Everyone was mingling and eating. Things were going well as they did the whole night. It was a really nice evening. My mixed emotions about this was that I had reached out to over 2000 people with this event. I worked my butt off trying to sell and advertise tickets. At the end of the night I did a head count and we had 56 people there, myself included! J and I have more than 50 people in our families. This however did not at all ruin my night. I still danced ( even though the majority of the time it was by myself, LOL)! I was just so worried the whole night that people thought I was a dud who couldn't get people there. I didn't want people to feel like they wasted their money or even an evening when this fundraiser felt very dull. No one was dancing, few people knew each other and a lot of people ended up leaving early. Again this did not ruin my night!
I told myself the day of, no matter what happens I will let nothing ruin my night or stress me out. So I let nothing bother me. I waited until Sunday morning to dwell on what I could have done or shouldn't have done. I was really bummed that all of my hard work didn't look like hard work at all. I wanted people to see how much I wanted to make a change in this Foundation and for my daughter. By looking around at the event I don't think people could feel my passion and it really upset me. After recounting the money box for the 5th time I felt a lot better, because of the generous people who did come and support me they helped me raise over $1000 to give to the CCFA! 56 people raised $1000, that is remarkable to me :) I then decided not to be upset or heart broken over anything. These people wanted to help and they did. I couldn't be more grateful! Those are the people who matter, not the ones who didn't show. They deserved my joy and thanks, not my whining or venting about what didn't happen! Everyone who helped me put this on worked hard and I think all in all we had a fun night that helped a foundation fund more research :) What more could I ask for right?!
So I have decided to be thankful for this year, but to work even harder next year! I will plan better and make the changes that need to be made! I will not stop fundraising or helping the CCFA though, it will be an everyday thing for me! I will however say, I do not for the life of me remember what I did with my spare time before this fundraiser idea came to mind, LOL!!!!
A big thank you to all of my friends and family who supported me through this fundraising process and attending my benefit. I will never forget what you all did for us to help make a difference!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Mother MD
So obviously I am not a doctor, but when it comes to my kids I often act like I am...LOL!
Miss Spitfire has been really good health wise lately, Thank you Lord! We are having a daily issue with her taking her meds though. Again this is a massive pill she must take 2X's a day. I open it up and put the contents of the pill in a yogurt or pudding ( not stirred at all). We were told to put the this in applesauce only and DO NOT stir any of it. My poor baby does not like any kind of applesauce and believe me we tried them all. So anyway... she is burnt out on yogurt and pudding. She cries almost every time I ask her to take her medicine. It can be heart breaking sometimes, cause you and I both know how it is when you are burnt out on something and you never ever want to eat or drink that ever again! Well she doesn't have the luxury of saying she won't ever eat it again.
So the Doctor that I am decided to negotiate with her. I said to her " you have done so well and we thank the Lord you have not had any bad days, let's stop the meds for ONE week and see how you do"! She was thrilled and to be honest I was too! She did awesome, things were going well ( we stuck to the diet of course, we will always stick with her new diet)! On day 6, Sunday, she cried about her stomach. She laid on the couch all evening and nothing was getting any better. Sadly she had to go to bed feeling this way cause there isn't anything I can give her to make it go away. Monday she didn't take it either, I wanted to give her a full 7 days to see! Yesterday my poor baby came home from school crying she had a headache and she had had it the entire day. She said her head was beeping and she was having a hard time seeing. I felt so bad, I of course gave her some Motrin and an hour later she was better. I said to myself, "the medicines do work and she needs to stay on them", DUH!!!!!
There is a reason she has GI doctor and there is a reason he prescribed this medicine for her! There is NO reason for me to think I could play doctor for a week and make my daughter suffer! He went to med school and all I did was deliver her... hmmmm who is more qualified to say if she needs to stay on her meds?! NOT ME!!! LOL, I am dork and yes she is back on the medicine today. I just feel so bad that she is back to the yogurts and puddings. So to all those mom's out there who play doctor like I do... DON'T!
I just wish there was another form of medicine for her take! This is just too much on a little girl who can't take a pill, let alone 2X's a day! So anyway I just thought I would share that her medicine is working and she is doing so well on it. It helps her so much and I just didn't see it!
So I will retire my MD title today :)
Miss Spitfire has been really good health wise lately, Thank you Lord! We are having a daily issue with her taking her meds though. Again this is a massive pill she must take 2X's a day. I open it up and put the contents of the pill in a yogurt or pudding ( not stirred at all). We were told to put the this in applesauce only and DO NOT stir any of it. My poor baby does not like any kind of applesauce and believe me we tried them all. So anyway... she is burnt out on yogurt and pudding. She cries almost every time I ask her to take her medicine. It can be heart breaking sometimes, cause you and I both know how it is when you are burnt out on something and you never ever want to eat or drink that ever again! Well she doesn't have the luxury of saying she won't ever eat it again.
So the Doctor that I am decided to negotiate with her. I said to her " you have done so well and we thank the Lord you have not had any bad days, let's stop the meds for ONE week and see how you do"! She was thrilled and to be honest I was too! She did awesome, things were going well ( we stuck to the diet of course, we will always stick with her new diet)! On day 6, Sunday, she cried about her stomach. She laid on the couch all evening and nothing was getting any better. Sadly she had to go to bed feeling this way cause there isn't anything I can give her to make it go away. Monday she didn't take it either, I wanted to give her a full 7 days to see! Yesterday my poor baby came home from school crying she had a headache and she had had it the entire day. She said her head was beeping and she was having a hard time seeing. I felt so bad, I of course gave her some Motrin and an hour later she was better. I said to myself, "the medicines do work and she needs to stay on them", DUH!!!!!
There is a reason she has GI doctor and there is a reason he prescribed this medicine for her! There is NO reason for me to think I could play doctor for a week and make my daughter suffer! He went to med school and all I did was deliver her... hmmmm who is more qualified to say if she needs to stay on her meds?! NOT ME!!! LOL, I am dork and yes she is back on the medicine today. I just feel so bad that she is back to the yogurts and puddings. So to all those mom's out there who play doctor like I do... DON'T!
I just wish there was another form of medicine for her take! This is just too much on a little girl who can't take a pill, let alone 2X's a day! So anyway I just thought I would share that her medicine is working and she is doing so well on it. It helps her so much and I just didn't see it!
So I will retire my MD title today :)
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
My walk with Christ
I just kind of wanted to write this blog so I can watch my relationship grow with Christ! I think it will be cool to read this in a few months just to see how I have progressed in my relationship and just to see how he really works in my life on a daily basis!
I am so happy where my walk is right now. I have never had this feeling before and I have to say it is the best feeling I ever had! He showing and teaching me things daily and I am loving it. I would like to point out I am nowhere where I want to be in my walk, I would like to think that right now I am at the middle mile marker of a marathon taking a water break to catch my breath!
God has shown me so much since I have found my new church home at LifePoint Church. Pastor Jym preaches to me every Sunday and I love it. Not a lot of people can say they feel the sermon hit them directly each week and right now in this time in my life...I can say that! I feel God next to me everyday. I am still struggling to give up my cursing and God knows how hard I am trying, but with over 10 years of cursing like a sailor... well let's just say I need a filter for my brain and right now it only works 1/2 the time. I hate that this has been such an obstacle for me. As soon as an ugly word comes out of my mouth I immediately feel remorse, but sadly can't take it back. So I am working on this! I am also working on my daily Bible readings. I can't stay consistent with it at all and that frustrates me so much. I sometimes say to myself well if I am reading a Bible Verse off of Facebook or Indymoms that counts. Well I am here to say that I know without a doubt that this thinking is so wrong. I know I need to sit down and have devotional time to really read study God's word. Why is this so hard for me? I can spend hours on the computer looking at this or reading that, but finding time ( quiet time) to do this is so hard for me. Again I am working on this as well :)
I am so happy in my new found relationship with Jesus Christ. He has been apart of my life since J came home from Iraq, but not really apart of my life is that makes any sense?! It has been within the last year that I have been really seeking him and letting him in my heart and life completely. I have always believed in him and I have always prayed nightly, but that was it... nothing more and nothing less. I now find myself longing for him. I find myself putting him first in my life. I find him in the strangest part of my days. I find him loving me unconditionally and always there to forgive me, carry me or pull me through. I find myself worshipping and praying constantly. If it weren't for KLove ( a radio station 101.9) I don't know how my days would turn out. I look forward to leaving the house because I know I am going to worship and my kids are learning his word and ministries through this as well. I just can't praise him enough.
My life should be in shambles with all of the sad news I have received the past couple of months and it just doesn't feel that way. I have my hard days, but more than not they are good days thanks to MY God. He pulls me through it all and I have complete faith in him to do so :) He is amazing! His love and Grace are amazing. I find myself having more Grace since last weeks sermon at church and oh my word has it made a difference the past 2 days. I find myself forgiving people and things I would of thought I could careless about. I find myself loving so many people and being able to share that love openly with them. I could go on and on and on, but for now, I would just like to say he has me wrapped around his finger like a child would be with their parents. Honestly it is the best feeling!
I know I will be in heaven someday and I love knowing who I will be with, but I also get very sad with the thought of the people I will not be with. God is a very forgiving God and I just hope all of my friends and family who aren't in a relationship with God will open their hearts and minds to him. Repent and love him, you too will feel the happiness I feel and you too could walk in the paradise known as Heaven with Jesus and me someday.
As my cousin so wonderfully put it (if I have to bury anyone else close to me or should I go before my loved ones), "instead of saying bye I want to say, see you later"! Through Christ is the only way to eternity and the only way of saying "see you later"!
I ask anyone who stumbles upon this to pray for the members in my family who do not believe or have a relationship with Christ, to open their hearts to him. For the Lord to somehow work himself into their lives. I also ask that you please continue to pray for My cousin John, my Uncle John and our entire family during this time.
I am so happy where my walk is right now. I have never had this feeling before and I have to say it is the best feeling I ever had! He showing and teaching me things daily and I am loving it. I would like to point out I am nowhere where I want to be in my walk, I would like to think that right now I am at the middle mile marker of a marathon taking a water break to catch my breath!
God has shown me so much since I have found my new church home at LifePoint Church. Pastor Jym preaches to me every Sunday and I love it. Not a lot of people can say they feel the sermon hit them directly each week and right now in this time in my life...I can say that! I feel God next to me everyday. I am still struggling to give up my cursing and God knows how hard I am trying, but with over 10 years of cursing like a sailor... well let's just say I need a filter for my brain and right now it only works 1/2 the time. I hate that this has been such an obstacle for me. As soon as an ugly word comes out of my mouth I immediately feel remorse, but sadly can't take it back. So I am working on this! I am also working on my daily Bible readings. I can't stay consistent with it at all and that frustrates me so much. I sometimes say to myself well if I am reading a Bible Verse off of Facebook or Indymoms that counts. Well I am here to say that I know without a doubt that this thinking is so wrong. I know I need to sit down and have devotional time to really read study God's word. Why is this so hard for me? I can spend hours on the computer looking at this or reading that, but finding time ( quiet time) to do this is so hard for me. Again I am working on this as well :)
I am so happy in my new found relationship with Jesus Christ. He has been apart of my life since J came home from Iraq, but not really apart of my life is that makes any sense?! It has been within the last year that I have been really seeking him and letting him in my heart and life completely. I have always believed in him and I have always prayed nightly, but that was it... nothing more and nothing less. I now find myself longing for him. I find myself putting him first in my life. I find him in the strangest part of my days. I find him loving me unconditionally and always there to forgive me, carry me or pull me through. I find myself worshipping and praying constantly. If it weren't for KLove ( a radio station 101.9) I don't know how my days would turn out. I look forward to leaving the house because I know I am going to worship and my kids are learning his word and ministries through this as well. I just can't praise him enough.
My life should be in shambles with all of the sad news I have received the past couple of months and it just doesn't feel that way. I have my hard days, but more than not they are good days thanks to MY God. He pulls me through it all and I have complete faith in him to do so :) He is amazing! His love and Grace are amazing. I find myself having more Grace since last weeks sermon at church and oh my word has it made a difference the past 2 days. I find myself forgiving people and things I would of thought I could careless about. I find myself loving so many people and being able to share that love openly with them. I could go on and on and on, but for now, I would just like to say he has me wrapped around his finger like a child would be with their parents. Honestly it is the best feeling!
I know I will be in heaven someday and I love knowing who I will be with, but I also get very sad with the thought of the people I will not be with. God is a very forgiving God and I just hope all of my friends and family who aren't in a relationship with God will open their hearts and minds to him. Repent and love him, you too will feel the happiness I feel and you too could walk in the paradise known as Heaven with Jesus and me someday.
As my cousin so wonderfully put it (if I have to bury anyone else close to me or should I go before my loved ones), "instead of saying bye I want to say, see you later"! Through Christ is the only way to eternity and the only way of saying "see you later"!
I ask anyone who stumbles upon this to pray for the members in my family who do not believe or have a relationship with Christ, to open their hearts to him. For the Lord to somehow work himself into their lives. I also ask that you please continue to pray for My cousin John, my Uncle John and our entire family during this time.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Can't get enough...
Of him... the love of my life! My rock, my best friend, my soul mate! ( sorry this is the only picture I have of him! He is going kill me if he sees this, but I don't care lol)
Of her... my little spitfire! She is wonderfully loving and outgoing! I will never get tired of the little love notes she leaves me in random places of the house. I will never grow tired of her fun spirit!
Of him... my buddy! He is my handsome young man who secretly cuddles with me every night! I will never get tired of his late night I love you's and kisses :) He keeps me laughing all day everyday!
Of them... my first and my last babies! They are both full of life and innocents! My angel is an old soul who has a spark in her eye. My sunshine is just that... a ray of sun every time she smiles at me! I will never get tired of the sweet hugs I get from both of them.With the sad news of my cousin, I can't seem to get enough of my family. I cherish every hug, every kiss and every I love you! This is my family and this is my life. I have noticed a change in us this week, I have let the little stuff go! I don't care if they all fight, if they run me ragged, if my house is total chaos... I just don't care and my house is seems peaceful! Life is full of unexpected surprises, good and bad. You never what life has in store for you, so I will no longer take my family, my life, my friends, the little stuff for granted again! To my magnificent family... I love you all with every part of my being. You all make me smile even if I don't want to. My life is truly wonderful in every way and it is because God put you all in my life. Love is something I am so happy to say that I have found in my life. Not just the words "I love you", but the never ending, take your breath away, heart swelling LOVE! I thank God for that and all of you :)
Please, please, please keep my cousin John in your prayers. He desperately needs them, he needs a miracle and I know God is capable of this... if we all PRAY!!!! Through Christ all things are possible :)
Monday, April 5, 2010
they fell right on me
a TON of bricks that is!
Let me start off by telling you that my dear cousin John was diagnosed with cancer a few weeks ago. This in itself was a major blow to our family, not only was he dealing with this but my Uncle (his dad) has been dealing with cancer for years. John and I are the same age...he is just 2 months older than me!
Anyway I knew he had some testing last week that was going to tell us how it spread, how fast and treatment options. So I knew today was the day for answers to all of this. My day started out well, I checked my email and facebook to see if anyone in my family messaged me and they hadn't. So I went to clean today, came home in a good mood and was ready to clean my house and the garage. I again checked everything to see if there was any news and again there wasn't!
I was on facebook and got a message that said call me from my Aunt! I immediately called, hoping she had some wonderful news to tell... it was AWFUL! I was in my garage when I called her and the news I got was, he has stage 4, incurable cancer! It was as if a ton of bricks fell on top of me and I couldn't move. The only thing my body was able to do was cry and shake. I honestly had not thought of this even being an option. I know people say to think of the worse case scenerio and all I thought was he will have to have radiation, surgery and chemo! Never in a million years did I think this would be the news he got from the doctor. I was so incredibly sad all day. I prayed and prayed and prayed, it was all I felt like I could do! I worshiped a lot as well. It was the only thing holding me up today after I got this call.
This just makes me think even more, make sure you tell your loved ones how you feel everyday. You never know what life will bring you or your loved ones. John and I have grown up, he lives in another state and we haven't talked in over a year. I did however grow up with him, he was a a favorite cousin of mine! I am very much in contact with his dad, sister and his mom! We are still family and I just feel so helpless.
I made sure today was a good day for my kids. I want to be a better mom and better everything to everyone, you never know what might happen! I made sure my kids had extra hugs, kisses and I love you's today. I made sure J knew I loved him before he left for work this evening. This is something I will be doing everyday. Life can be short and I don't want to take anyone in my life for granted at all. God was my strength today and I hope he is the strength that will get my family through all of this. My girls prayed for John tonight and we had a talk about cancer. It was something that was very hard for me to get through without breaking down, but I did it. I am happy to share this news with my girls and them to see that God is the one who will help us! Such a good feeling to a horrible day!
Through all of the sadness, I will continue to praise the Lord. I will worship him for all he is and all he does. He is bigger than all of this and I know he will get everyone through this. He gives me hope in Heaven and eternal life! I pray for his return everyday. I don't want to do this here, I don't want to feel anymore sadness, anymore pain, I don't ever want to have to bury anyone close to me again. I want to share joy and laughter everyday with all the ones I love and most of all celebrate everyday with Jesus. The day will come, but until then... I will do all I can to bring him Glory and trust in him!
Hug your babies tonight and thank the Lord for that extra hug :)
Please pray for John and our entire family during this very difficult time.
Let me start off by telling you that my dear cousin John was diagnosed with cancer a few weeks ago. This in itself was a major blow to our family, not only was he dealing with this but my Uncle (his dad) has been dealing with cancer for years. John and I are the same age...he is just 2 months older than me!
Anyway I knew he had some testing last week that was going to tell us how it spread, how fast and treatment options. So I knew today was the day for answers to all of this. My day started out well, I checked my email and facebook to see if anyone in my family messaged me and they hadn't. So I went to clean today, came home in a good mood and was ready to clean my house and the garage. I again checked everything to see if there was any news and again there wasn't!
I was on facebook and got a message that said call me from my Aunt! I immediately called, hoping she had some wonderful news to tell... it was AWFUL! I was in my garage when I called her and the news I got was, he has stage 4, incurable cancer! It was as if a ton of bricks fell on top of me and I couldn't move. The only thing my body was able to do was cry and shake. I honestly had not thought of this even being an option. I know people say to think of the worse case scenerio and all I thought was he will have to have radiation, surgery and chemo! Never in a million years did I think this would be the news he got from the doctor. I was so incredibly sad all day. I prayed and prayed and prayed, it was all I felt like I could do! I worshiped a lot as well. It was the only thing holding me up today after I got this call.
This just makes me think even more, make sure you tell your loved ones how you feel everyday. You never know what life will bring you or your loved ones. John and I have grown up, he lives in another state and we haven't talked in over a year. I did however grow up with him, he was a a favorite cousin of mine! I am very much in contact with his dad, sister and his mom! We are still family and I just feel so helpless.
I made sure today was a good day for my kids. I want to be a better mom and better everything to everyone, you never know what might happen! I made sure my kids had extra hugs, kisses and I love you's today. I made sure J knew I loved him before he left for work this evening. This is something I will be doing everyday. Life can be short and I don't want to take anyone in my life for granted at all. God was my strength today and I hope he is the strength that will get my family through all of this. My girls prayed for John tonight and we had a talk about cancer. It was something that was very hard for me to get through without breaking down, but I did it. I am happy to share this news with my girls and them to see that God is the one who will help us! Such a good feeling to a horrible day!
Through all of the sadness, I will continue to praise the Lord. I will worship him for all he is and all he does. He is bigger than all of this and I know he will get everyone through this. He gives me hope in Heaven and eternal life! I pray for his return everyday. I don't want to do this here, I don't want to feel anymore sadness, anymore pain, I don't ever want to have to bury anyone close to me again. I want to share joy and laughter everyday with all the ones I love and most of all celebrate everyday with Jesus. The day will come, but until then... I will do all I can to bring him Glory and trust in him!
Hug your babies tonight and thank the Lord for that extra hug :)
Please pray for John and our entire family during this very difficult time.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
23 days
Today marks 23 days until my Fundraiser!!!! I am super excited the month is finally here, but super freaked about not having all of the little things even started yet!
I once again am just completely overwhelmed by the amount of individuals and businesses who were willing to donate for our auctions, raffles and door prizes! All of the stuff was transferred from my house to my mom's house because I ran out of room to store it all ( plus little fingers were pulling things out, lol)! We have bags and bags and bags and bags to go through next week. It is awesome!
I must confess ( just so I remember this feeling next year) that I am so worried people are not going to purchase tickets to attend! I have a ton of people who say they want to go or plan on going but not actually buying tickets! I have a pretty good start to my guest list, but I just wish I could fill it up quickly so I know what to expect! The unknown is what is getting to me. I am an organizer, a planner, I am the one who has every detail of a big party planned out, so this is new to me!
I will totally be happy with whatever number of guests we have. I will also be thrilled with whatever dollar amount we make, even if we don't hit my goal of $5000! I know that every dollar I raise is one more dollar they didn't have! I will say I have raised $525 through my web page and another team mate as raised $50! So that alone is absolutely wonderful!
The next couple of weeks is going to be so crazy and hectic for me, but I hope I can do it all with patience and full of energy! My goofy self decided to have a yard sale this upcoming week as well, so I just added to my work load for no good reason at all, lol! Oh well, the money I make at the sale will in return be used on auction items at the fundraiser :)
If interested in the Fundraiser details or if you are interested in attending please click on any of the purple Fundraisers and all of the details are in there! Please pray for me, my committee and the event itself. Pray it is a success, we don't get stressed out, we all stay healthy this month, we have fun doing the final plannings and no matter what happens that we are happy with the end result! God is good and I know this is all happening because of him, to God be the Glory!
I once again am just completely overwhelmed by the amount of individuals and businesses who were willing to donate for our auctions, raffles and door prizes! All of the stuff was transferred from my house to my mom's house because I ran out of room to store it all ( plus little fingers were pulling things out, lol)! We have bags and bags and bags and bags to go through next week. It is awesome!
I must confess ( just so I remember this feeling next year) that I am so worried people are not going to purchase tickets to attend! I have a ton of people who say they want to go or plan on going but not actually buying tickets! I have a pretty good start to my guest list, but I just wish I could fill it up quickly so I know what to expect! The unknown is what is getting to me. I am an organizer, a planner, I am the one who has every detail of a big party planned out, so this is new to me!
I will totally be happy with whatever number of guests we have. I will also be thrilled with whatever dollar amount we make, even if we don't hit my goal of $5000! I know that every dollar I raise is one more dollar they didn't have! I will say I have raised $525 through my web page and another team mate as raised $50! So that alone is absolutely wonderful!
The next couple of weeks is going to be so crazy and hectic for me, but I hope I can do it all with patience and full of energy! My goofy self decided to have a yard sale this upcoming week as well, so I just added to my work load for no good reason at all, lol! Oh well, the money I make at the sale will in return be used on auction items at the fundraiser :)
If interested in the Fundraiser details or if you are interested in attending please click on any of the purple Fundraisers and all of the details are in there! Please pray for me, my committee and the event itself. Pray it is a success, we don't get stressed out, we all stay healthy this month, we have fun doing the final plannings and no matter what happens that we are happy with the end result! God is good and I know this is all happening because of him, to God be the Glory!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
America's Greatest Past Time
That's right people... it is BASEBALL and SOFTBALL season!!!!This is last years photos, but you get the idea! Miss Spitfire ( holding the banner in the pink jacket) will be playing her 2nd year in softball and Wild Man will be playing his first year in Baseball!
Yes he was wearing snow boots with his Baseball gear last year LOL, but this year he is in tune with the appropriate gear, hehe! He has had 2 practices so far and he LOVES it! He is into batting, fielding and running the bases! I was super nervous about him playing this year, only because he is so young ( he will be 4 in May)! He is listening to the Coach ( my wonderful brother in law) and is enjoying being around all boys! We do have 2 girls on the team, but he doesn't mind them at all, he is too busy with practicing to pay attention to the girls :) So far it's going well!This will be our first year in 3 years of baseball/softball season that I will have 2 kids in 2 different townships playing though. I am a little worried about missing someone's practice or game, but I know it will have to happen a couple of times. It's not that they will be left there without a parent or grandparent ( someone will always be there), it's the fact I don't ever remember a time when my Mom wasn't at one of my sports functions and I want my kids to have the same memory with me. I know whatever game or practice I happen to miss, will be the one where they do something fantastic and I will feel sad for missing their big moment! So with the excitement that the seasons have started I am just a little worried about being in 2 places at once! It will work out though, I know it will!
Yay, for spring! Yay, for ball!! Yay, for making new friends!!! Yay, for making new memories!!!! I can't wait for opening days! PLAY BALL...
Sunday, March 21, 2010
What is happening
I can't begin to tell you how incredibly sad and scared I am with the new Health Care Bill that passed tonight. I will say what a sad day in America it has become. We no longer live by the words, for the people, by the people... we now live by what the Government tells us. What is happening to America?! Why in the world would these democrats feel that this is good for us? I could get into the facts, but why even bother!
I will just say I have 4 wonderful and beautiful children. One of which requires more medical attention than the others, as most of you already know. My beautiful daughter (Spitfire) has Crohn's and what comes with this disease is MANY doctor appointments and daily medications until they find a cure! With this new bill, we may not be able to see our doctor that we have grown to love, but better yet one that Gov't tells us to go see. If they don't find it to be important or an emergency she also may not get her daily meds. They will also raise the prices of her medications, that I have to tell you already cost a fortune ( we buy these monthly)! Miss Spitfire also needs her tonsils out very badly, if this is signed by our "not so wonderful President" before we get this scheduled, they may not see the need for this to be done right away. I am just so sad.
I am so ready for the next election to happen. I am so nervous for what our future holds with Obama in the President's chair. He makes me quezzy sometimes, I have no idea why I get that feeling but I do and I don't like it. I know we are supposed to support our President, but I don't feel like he has us average Joe's in mind in his desicion making. Therefore I can't support a President who doesn't support us.
I am so ready for the Lord to come. I am ready to take my family home... to a place that niether you or I can possibly imagine what he has waiting for us. I am ready to witness the awe, ready to witness my daughter feeling healthy everyday, to never ever need a doctor, for my children, J and I to never shed another tear, to always be smiling, to share the joy in life at all times and best of all ...to walk next to my Savior, my God, OUR KING!
Lord I pray, Please come QUICKLY!!!!!
I will just say I have 4 wonderful and beautiful children. One of which requires more medical attention than the others, as most of you already know. My beautiful daughter (Spitfire) has Crohn's and what comes with this disease is MANY doctor appointments and daily medications until they find a cure! With this new bill, we may not be able to see our doctor that we have grown to love, but better yet one that Gov't tells us to go see. If they don't find it to be important or an emergency she also may not get her daily meds. They will also raise the prices of her medications, that I have to tell you already cost a fortune ( we buy these monthly)! Miss Spitfire also needs her tonsils out very badly, if this is signed by our "not so wonderful President" before we get this scheduled, they may not see the need for this to be done right away. I am just so sad.
I am so ready for the next election to happen. I am so nervous for what our future holds with Obama in the President's chair. He makes me quezzy sometimes, I have no idea why I get that feeling but I do and I don't like it. I know we are supposed to support our President, but I don't feel like he has us average Joe's in mind in his desicion making. Therefore I can't support a President who doesn't support us.
I am so ready for the Lord to come. I am ready to take my family home... to a place that niether you or I can possibly imagine what he has waiting for us. I am ready to witness the awe, ready to witness my daughter feeling healthy everyday, to never ever need a doctor, for my children, J and I to never shed another tear, to always be smiling, to share the joy in life at all times and best of all ...to walk next to my Savior, my God, OUR KING!
Lord I pray, Please come QUICKLY!!!!!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
My baby's birth story
My baby girl's due date was March 18th. On this day 2 years ago she graced us with her presence :)
My entire pregnancy with her I had a bleed in my placenta, so I was high risk the entire time. Which was scary at first, but she was a fighter and I did all I could to keep her healthy! I had went into labor at 30 weeks so I went to the hospital and my doctor was able to stop her from coming. I was terrified, but so happy she decided to stay put!
I had many doctors appointments and ultra sounds following, which was always nice to see her and make sure she was growing and healthy. At 38 weeks I had went into labor again, this time I was thrilled! I knew we had made it to the safe point so I called my Mom ( J was at work). She came over and brought my beautiful Granni. My Mom helped me get the older kids ready for bed and helped me pack my bag. My Granni stayed home with the older kids and Mom took me to the Hospital. I called J on the way and as soon as I got there. He didn't want to leave work if it wasn't true labor. So the doctor hooked me up to machines and said your contracting great, but we are going to stop it and see if she will hold off until your due date. I was so disappointed, but knew it wasn't meant to be with J being at work, my in laws weren't available to come up and my 78 year old Granni was with the kids! So we went home :(
I had a doctors appointment that following week and she scheduled an induction on March 18th! I had never had one of my babies on my actual due date, so that was kind of cool! I planned for my wonderful sister in law to skip school and sit at home with the kids that day. Well it was really just Wild Man cause the girls were in school. J, my mom and J's parents were there all morning with me, we had to be there at 7am. I had the pitocin in by 8am and things were moving along nicely. Later in the afternoon my sister in law showed up to hang out with us as well. It was a really nice time chatting and laughing with everyone while I labored.
Finally the contractions were more than I could take and I am all about an epidural so we called in the anesthesiologist! She was wonderful and had me hooked up quickly. The sad thing is it was about 12:30pm and it wasn't working. I could barely talk or move the contractions were so bad. They were coming so quick, one right after another and they lasted for what felt like forever. So I called in the so called " magic woman" again and she was arguing with me about the epidural working. Finally I told her I can't handle it and she needed to either put more meds in or re-do it cause I was miserable. So she just added more meds in, which didn't help at the time at all!
Wonderful Dr. Davidson came in to check me and said well they hurt so much because her head is right there and you are more than ready to push! My Mom, J and J's Mom stayed in the room while my father in law and sister in law went in the waiting room! Dr. Davidson got already (she did this super fast) and all of a sudden my epidural kicked in and I couldn't feel to push.
It was not a good feeling to be popping all the blood vessels in my face trying to push and she said I wasn't pushing correctly. So we waited a few minutes for "crazy magic lady" to come back in and turn the epidural off! It never helped, but I wanted to see my baby, so I gave it all I had... 3 hard pushes, a vacuum and wallah... she was laying on my stomach!
She was beautiful, she looked so chubby and so colored. She had perfect skin, but a huge cone head :( All of my babies look Indian when they come out, tons of black hair and tan skin! She cried and cried. The nurses did everything in the room, so she never left my room our entire hospital stay. I loved that about that hospital. She was a whopping 8lbs 6oz 19in. long!!! She completed our family at 2:20pm
Our whole family and all of our friends came to the hospital to welcome her! I finally had the feeling of being complete after she was born. I had never experienced this feeling after the births of my other children and that is why I never did anything permanent! 6 weeks after my beautiful baby was born I had a tubal! So we won't be having anymore babies, but I am thrilled to watch them grow and see who they all will become.
Baby girl, Happy Birthday! I love you so much, you are such a beautiful little girl who I love with all of my heart and soul! God made you perfect and knew you would be the perfect child to complete our family!
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
2 in 2 days
She knows her Birthday is coming, She keeps saying " my Bersday"! She also keeps asking for presents!!! ( sorry for the blurry pic, but I couldn't resist that awesome smile :)
She talks in sentences and will laugh at herself often, just like her mother, LOL!!!
She is off the bottle and totally interested in going to the big girl potty, but gets scared of the toilet! She will sometimes drink out of a big kid cup without the lid and she hardly spills any of it!
She is no longer in a high chair. She would much rather sit at the table like a big girl with the big kids. She can dress and undress herself, she even picks out what she wants to wear ( most of the time she doesn't get to wear it though... usually a jammie shirt and some weird pants with 2 different shoes, LOL)!
My baby is all grown up and in 2 days she will be 2 years old! She will no longer be a baby, but in our house will always be called the baby! I think this year is going to be a very fun year with her, although 2's in my house are typically wild :)
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Growing Old
Today at church I realized I always sit behind the same couple. They seem so sweet and cute! They are an older couple, probably in their late 50's early 60's! Today during worship I really noticed them, they were praising and singing next to each other and although they never touched...I could sense their love for one another and their love for God! It was so touching and refreshing to see.
I come from a "broken home" ( although I absolutely hate that term, my home was not broken at all, my Dad and Mom just didn't stay married). I know so many people my age who come from divorced parents and who are divorced themselves. I want to say I think that their is absolutely nothing wrong with divorce, no one should live an unhappy life. With that said, I love to see old couples still together, married for 50+years, have kids and grandbabies! I hope to someday say J and I have been married for that long! I also hope to grow close to God as a married couple.
I know my personal relationship with God has grown and is so wonderful right now and I still have so much growing left to do! I just would like for us as a married couple to be able to study the Bible together,worship together, have versus to remember each week, possibly attend the couples retreat that is often offered at most churches and most definitely be able to attend church service together. J loves our Savior and has his own relationship with him. Although we don't talk about it a lot I think he knows more about scripture and the life of a Christian more than I do. So I want everyone to know he is a son of God and knows what it takes to walk with God! We sadly can't attend church service as a family due to J's work schedule. He works every single Sunday. He is always great about asking how it went as soon as I load the kids in the van when service is over and I usually tell him what the message was about. I know he wants to go and be with us in the house of the Lord, learning, praising and worshiping! I also know the Lord knows this as well. He knows I long for my family to be a family at church and he knows J wants to be there.
Back to my cute little couple, I found myself watching them all morning. I heard the message and I worshiped with all of my heart, but found myself watching them time and time again. How long have they been married? How did they get to the point of where they are as a couple with God? I kept saying to myself I bet there kids are here somewhere with their grandbabies in the nursery! I found myself wanting to be them in 35-40 years!
Every marriage has it's ups and downs! Every marriage has it's challenges and obsticles to overcome. J and I have had a sometimes bumpy road in the last 14 years we have been together, but today we are wonderful :) He warms my heart, puts a smile on my face, provides for our family and most of loves me for me and I know in my heart he truly loves me. That is such a wonderful feeling :) I know whatever turmoil comes our way we will overcome it and be together forever. We will be that old couple rocking in our rocking chairs on the porch watching the sun come up, lol...ok maybe not watching the sun come up, but you get what I am saying!!! We will grow old together and I know it. We have a love that is stronger than us, if that makes any sense to you! He is my rock and I like to believe I am his as well.
So to all of you out there who are still married to your first love, I toast to you...to another 50+ happy years together!
J, through the good, bad and ugly I love you with all of my heart!
I come from a "broken home" ( although I absolutely hate that term, my home was not broken at all, my Dad and Mom just didn't stay married). I know so many people my age who come from divorced parents and who are divorced themselves. I want to say I think that their is absolutely nothing wrong with divorce, no one should live an unhappy life. With that said, I love to see old couples still together, married for 50+years, have kids and grandbabies! I hope to someday say J and I have been married for that long! I also hope to grow close to God as a married couple.
I know my personal relationship with God has grown and is so wonderful right now and I still have so much growing left to do! I just would like for us as a married couple to be able to study the Bible together,worship together, have versus to remember each week, possibly attend the couples retreat that is often offered at most churches and most definitely be able to attend church service together. J loves our Savior and has his own relationship with him. Although we don't talk about it a lot I think he knows more about scripture and the life of a Christian more than I do. So I want everyone to know he is a son of God and knows what it takes to walk with God! We sadly can't attend church service as a family due to J's work schedule. He works every single Sunday. He is always great about asking how it went as soon as I load the kids in the van when service is over and I usually tell him what the message was about. I know he wants to go and be with us in the house of the Lord, learning, praising and worshiping! I also know the Lord knows this as well. He knows I long for my family to be a family at church and he knows J wants to be there.
Back to my cute little couple, I found myself watching them all morning. I heard the message and I worshiped with all of my heart, but found myself watching them time and time again. How long have they been married? How did they get to the point of where they are as a couple with God? I kept saying to myself I bet there kids are here somewhere with their grandbabies in the nursery! I found myself wanting to be them in 35-40 years!
Every marriage has it's ups and downs! Every marriage has it's challenges and obsticles to overcome. J and I have had a sometimes bumpy road in the last 14 years we have been together, but today we are wonderful :) He warms my heart, puts a smile on my face, provides for our family and most of loves me for me and I know in my heart he truly loves me. That is such a wonderful feeling :) I know whatever turmoil comes our way we will overcome it and be together forever. We will be that old couple rocking in our rocking chairs on the porch watching the sun come up, lol...ok maybe not watching the sun come up, but you get what I am saying!!! We will grow old together and I know it. We have a love that is stronger than us, if that makes any sense to you! He is my rock and I like to believe I am his as well.
So to all of you out there who are still married to your first love, I toast to you...to another 50+ happy years together!
J, through the good, bad and ugly I love you with all of my heart!
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
9 days
My beautiful 
sweet baby
girl will be
2 years old!
These past 2 years have flown by. Sunshine you have grown into quite the spunky little pistol that you are! You are beautiful with a very sassy attitude! I wish you the happiest birthday week! It makes me sad to think this is the last 2nd birthday we will celebrate in our family, time is flying by while my kiddos are growing up. I enjoy every day of it though, even the rough ones! Sunshine you keep me on my toes but you always put a smile on my face! I love you so very much!
Monday, March 8, 2010
You've Got Mail
Is my absolute favorite movie! I can sit and watch that movie over and over and cry every time I watch it!
I am not sure why I like it so much, but I do know I love the love in this love story! (Did I say the word Love enough in that sentence, LOL) It is not just the obvious love story, but I love the character of Kathleen Kelly. The love she has for her work, for her city, for her in box that says "You've Got Mail", for the hopes of finding love and most of all the love she has for her mother! Ahh this movie is so wonderful.
I enjoy all the songs that are in this movie, it makes me dance a little with every one that starts. I find myself wishing I had the outlook on life that Kathleen portrays. I want to someday think my kids will love me like she loves her mother. Her mother created amazing memories for her, which you know is how I live my life ( making memories for my kids)! I enjoy watching her and the way she loves and lives for her adorable little book store. I would love to have a job that will affect and shape the children of our future. To be that person who loves the city I live in, as if the thought of living anywhere else is not even in the realm of possibilities! I love the city I live in, but I love it because my family is here. I love that I have childhood memories here. I do not love it just because I think it is magical and wonderful.
Ahhh the way this movie makes me feel. I finish watching this movie with the most upbeat feeling and positive attitude. I always finish it wanting to go out and buy a bouquet of white daisies and a box of Kleenex!
There is no point what so ever about this post, besides the fact I am watching this movie and wanted to share my love for it! "Kathleen Kelly" such a wonderful character!
I am not sure why I like it so much, but I do know I love the love in this love story! (Did I say the word Love enough in that sentence, LOL) It is not just the obvious love story, but I love the character of Kathleen Kelly. The love she has for her work, for her city, for her in box that says "You've Got Mail", for the hopes of finding love and most of all the love she has for her mother! Ahh this movie is so wonderful.
I enjoy all the songs that are in this movie, it makes me dance a little with every one that starts. I find myself wishing I had the outlook on life that Kathleen portrays. I want to someday think my kids will love me like she loves her mother. Her mother created amazing memories for her, which you know is how I live my life ( making memories for my kids)! I enjoy watching her and the way she loves and lives for her adorable little book store. I would love to have a job that will affect and shape the children of our future. To be that person who loves the city I live in, as if the thought of living anywhere else is not even in the realm of possibilities! I love the city I live in, but I love it because my family is here. I love that I have childhood memories here. I do not love it just because I think it is magical and wonderful.
Ahhh the way this movie makes me feel. I finish watching this movie with the most upbeat feeling and positive attitude. I always finish it wanting to go out and buy a bouquet of white daisies and a box of Kleenex!
There is no point what so ever about this post, besides the fact I am watching this movie and wanted to share my love for it! "Kathleen Kelly" such a wonderful character!
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Stop kidding yourself
Well it has been a rough couple of weeks here at my house with all of the sickies! It started with Spitfire, she had a fever, headache, sore throat and ears. I took her to the doctor and they gave her an antibiotic. It went away for a week and then came back, so we did the same thing again meds and it was gone. Then I got really sick with all of the same symptoms but knew I had Strep and a sinus infection, I was down and out for 3 days solid. My meds made me feel better and I was back on my feet and feeling great! Now Spitfire is sick again!
I now know with her and her Crohn's, her sinus' will act up causing all of her pain and antibiotics is not the answer, they don't help! I had no idea about any of this. I was getting so frustrated with her pediatrician and in fact it wasn't her fault at all, just Crohn's!
I keep getting asked how I stay so up-beat and positive with all of this and all of her symptoms and problems. My answer is always the same, if I don't say strong and positive... she won't either. If I don't stay positive all of the thoughts and sadness can and will take over and I will be useless to her and my family. I always feel a negative person is a sad person and they typically annoy me. Why be negative all of the time, that logic can't make life very fun! So I refuse to be that person and I refuse to let this disease win and control our lives. Yes it will control my Spitfire's life to a degree, but I hope not on her outlook on life!
I am not trying to kid myself here though, I am being honest when I say... I have meltdowns! Not uncontrolable crying ( well sometimes tears), but mental meltdowns. I get sad and question everything I do and say. I question the doctors, I question what should I or could I have done. I feel so bad and sad for her, it sometimes gets a little overwhelming. I am not a rock of stone with no feeling or emotions about this. I just try to conceal my feelings and thoughts for her and my family. I feel it is my duty to be the strong one and sometimes that alone can be overwhelming if I feel like I have let them see me upset or when I talk about it out loud for her and them to hear!
I do know that I have not and will never question why. I don't know why, but I know God knows why and that is answer enough for me! I will continue to lean on him during all of this and after this! He is seeing me through this and for him I am grateful and give him praise! He is the rock in all of this who I know I can stand on when I need to! I give him all of the glory in this and that helps me put a smile on face after I get or hear bad news or when Spitfire is down and not feeling well. God is working miracles in my life and even if I haven't seen them yet, I trust in him enough to know he is!
I can't tell you how frustrating it is to have a child who is ill all of the time and their is not a thing you can do for them to make them feel better. I am a mother praying and begging for everyone to help spread the word about this disease and to beg everyone who reads this to join me at The Fundraiser, Dinner Dance for Straton's Team on April 24th, 2010! Please if you are interested in coming email me at amberm11283@yahoo.com! If you want to help but can't make the event feel free to make a donation to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation by going to www.cctakesteps.org and search for Straton's Team and make a donation for our team!
I now know with her and her Crohn's, her sinus' will act up causing all of her pain and antibiotics is not the answer, they don't help! I had no idea about any of this. I was getting so frustrated with her pediatrician and in fact it wasn't her fault at all, just Crohn's!
I keep getting asked how I stay so up-beat and positive with all of this and all of her symptoms and problems. My answer is always the same, if I don't say strong and positive... she won't either. If I don't stay positive all of the thoughts and sadness can and will take over and I will be useless to her and my family. I always feel a negative person is a sad person and they typically annoy me. Why be negative all of the time, that logic can't make life very fun! So I refuse to be that person and I refuse to let this disease win and control our lives. Yes it will control my Spitfire's life to a degree, but I hope not on her outlook on life!
I am not trying to kid myself here though, I am being honest when I say... I have meltdowns! Not uncontrolable crying ( well sometimes tears), but mental meltdowns. I get sad and question everything I do and say. I question the doctors, I question what should I or could I have done. I feel so bad and sad for her, it sometimes gets a little overwhelming. I am not a rock of stone with no feeling or emotions about this. I just try to conceal my feelings and thoughts for her and my family. I feel it is my duty to be the strong one and sometimes that alone can be overwhelming if I feel like I have let them see me upset or when I talk about it out loud for her and them to hear!
I do know that I have not and will never question why. I don't know why, but I know God knows why and that is answer enough for me! I will continue to lean on him during all of this and after this! He is seeing me through this and for him I am grateful and give him praise! He is the rock in all of this who I know I can stand on when I need to! I give him all of the glory in this and that helps me put a smile on face after I get or hear bad news or when Spitfire is down and not feeling well. God is working miracles in my life and even if I haven't seen them yet, I trust in him enough to know he is!
I can't tell you how frustrating it is to have a child who is ill all of the time and their is not a thing you can do for them to make them feel better. I am a mother praying and begging for everyone to help spread the word about this disease and to beg everyone who reads this to join me at The Fundraiser, Dinner Dance for Straton's Team on April 24th, 2010! Please if you are interested in coming email me at amberm11283@yahoo.com! If you want to help but can't make the event feel free to make a donation to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation by going to www.cctakesteps.org and search for Straton's Team and make a donation for our team!
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